Sky took the lenses out of a pair of sunglasses and likes to wear them when he’s “working” so he can “see”. Here he is diligently folding towels, one of his favorite pastimes. I know it’s February, but Christmas jammies are still just as comfy.
Living with a 3 year old, there is always a constant struggle of getting things done {anything…} in a timely, efficient manner. Sky will delay any task he can such as eating breakfast, getting dressed, changing his diaper, going to bed, turning off the tv, etc. AND will simultaneously have a tantrum if he doesn’t get to “help” with grown up chores like folding laundry, pouring juice/milk, letting the dog outside, or closing the garage door. Combine the two, and it can take hours upon hours to finish a project {or even a basic household chore}, or worse yet, get out of the house anywhere on time.
It’s an area I constantly struggle with. I know he’s not always doing it on purpose. I know he just wants to help. I know my patience is often too short. And, I know I need to have more discipline and structure for him.
So, when I recently came across this article: Putting Aside Perfection: Letting your younger kids help, it really hit home. It was my gentle kick in the pants to remind myself that while it’s very easy to get flustered and feel like nothing is ever getting accomplished, it’s harder {but better}, to help your toddler foster independence, teach them how to do basic life skills, and at the same time, work on improving my own patience and threshold for coping with an indecisive, demanding, and stubborn little person.
Around the same time I found the first article, I also found this one: How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Child. While it doesn’t focus exclusively on the topic of letting kids “help”, it is a great reminder that between day-to-day life, ACTUAL UNINTERRUPTED, PRESENT, QUALITY TIME with your child is what fosters a relationship. Letting your kids into your life and finding ways to connect with them is important. So, if the garden needs watering and the bathrooms need cleaning, why not use it as a way to connect?
All things that have been on my mind lately as Sky seems as fiesty as ever and we prepare to welcome a new little one that {i'm sure} will totally change the dynamic of how our home functions.
How do you find ways to connect with your kiddo and let them still feel like they are contributing and "helping"? Any tips to share?
Even more great resources:
I also heard a story on NPR about how we should let younger children do chores, to instill the value within them when they are young, and help them understand that it's part of everyday life. I felt like I've been doing that for a while, but it hearing the story really helped me let go of trying to get things done as quickly as possible, all the time. If it takes twice as long to clean Laelia's room, oh well! She's learning about more than just cleaning, she's learning about sorting, and folding, and developing her fine motor skills. Totally worth it!
Posted by: Jesyka | February 28, 2013 at 10:55 AM
It's so hard when time is at a premium. But I have noticed with T that she actually does get better pretty quickly with practice. Her current chores are: 1. putting away the clean silverware and 2. putting away her clean clothes from the laundry (as well as picking up the clothes strewn around her room). Oh and 3. Keeping her own toys put away. She goes to Montessori preschool so they're big on cleaning up, and doing a good job of things.
Posted by: ARC | March 01, 2013 at 06:44 PM