Peck Life

Ben's Birth Story

At 2 a.m. Monday morning, April 1st, Sky came into our room during one of his regular night time waking's {still happening at age 3…}. After getting him back to bed, Josh and I lied there awake, feeling frustrated, and wondering if we were ever going to get a full nights sleep again. Josh muttered “I would just like 3 solid nights of sleep before this baby arrives”, and I quickly agreed.

A few minutes later, I felt a “pop”.

OH MY GOD. I think my water just broke.

I laid there frozen, worried at what I had just felt. I was only 37 weeks, 6 days. The nursery wasn’t finished! My bag wasn’t packed! The house was still dirty! I hadn’t had time to get a pedicure yet! I was supposed to work for 2 more weeks!

I decided to sit up to check my suspicion and knew instantly by the amount of fluid that was gushing out of me. This was the real deal. I called my midwife, who suggested I stay at home until morning unless my contractions started coming on heavy. I was nervous that it was only a matter of time before we’d have to leave so I quickly showered, packed, and starting frantically organizing the house to make sure everything was in order. By 4:30 a.m., still not much was happening so I went to sleep until 7 a.m.. By 8 a.m., I was back on the phone with the midwife and we both agreed I’d stay home a little longer and wait for labor to begin but if there still wasn’t action by 1 p.m., I would come into the office to get checked. I was assured I could safely go for at least 12 hours with broken water but they still wanted to make sure Ben was okay and not under stress.

The remainder of the morning was spent getting ready, eating a huge breakfast, and freaking out. It was April fools day so I sent an email to work and a few friends only to get handful of responses about me joking. Not so! Soon, we left for our appointment, car fully packed and ready to go…realizing we might not be returning home empty handed. I was scared and felt a little sad that I hadn’t been able to snuggle and hold Sky much that morning because we were so busy getting ready. Little did I know that bedtime on Easter was my last cuddle session alone with him as my only boy.

At my appointment, it was confirmed I was leaking amniotic fluid and I found out I was 2cm dilated. Because of the heightened risk of infection, we elected to admit me and get started on a very low dose of pitocin to move things along. I was a little weary because of the many horror stories I’d heard about pitocin but in this case, the it was the  right choice to get this baby out sooner rather than later.

While we were waiting to be assigned a room, they monitored me in triage and discovered there was some cord compression happening somewhere {turns out later the cord was wrapped loosely around his neck, eeeeeek!}. Because Ben was recovering differently with every contraction, they decided to monitor me for a while before starting the Pitocin.

Around 3:30/4ish, I got the lowest dose possible and that was all it took.

By 5:30, contractions were regular, strong, and painful. Josh had left to go grab some dinner prior to things really heating up and when he returned, he found me hunched over in the rocking chair, breathing and rocking with each wave.

It was very important to me to have a natural, un-medicated birth in terms of pain management. I had an epidural with Sky and I didn’t want another one. I wanted to see what it felt like with nothing. I wanted to know how bad it would get. I wanted to be able to feel everything and see if I could really handle it.

Each contraction was stronger than the next and between Josh, the midwife, and the doula, we tried a lot of different positions and tactics. Slow dancing with Josh and rocking in the rocker with lots of pillows underneath me were the best. All the others were uncomfortable and seemed to cause more pain.

After a few hours of this, I started to wonder where I was at. The pain was getting really intense and although I wasn’t completely exhausted, I could tell that my body was weakening and I hoped so bad I only had a few more hours left. Around 9 p.m., I was 7 cm dilated. Ok, not much longer, I thought….I can do this.

Progressing from 7-10 was BY FAR the worst. The pain was so powerful I don’t remember looking at anyone or making eye contact. All I could do was grip onto the sides of the bed and moan through each contraction. By that point, I was sure that people in the next room could hear me. I was so sweaty and everything just felt like a complete blur.

A little after 10 p.m., I started feeling a lot of pressure and was sure this was the “urge to push” that everyone talks about. I don’t really remember much after that. I know people were giving me instructions and I followed along but it was really one of those things where you kind of go inside your body and everything around you becomes muffled sounds and movement.

I could feel that my midwife wasn’t in the room and she had been missing for some time. Turns out, the one other patient she was tending to went into labor at the same time! A few other doctors came into the room, introduced themselves, and said they were going to take over in the event my midwife couldn’t make it in time. It was a little bit of a let down but about 10 minutes later, she came running in just in the nick of time!!!!

All of a sudden, I was ready to push and felt a huge wave of relief knowing that everything was almost over! I pushed for a total of 14 minutes and while it was definitely painful, it actually felt more natural and relaxing to be focusing on pushing than it did trying to muster my way through the hard contractions. They were directing me on where to push and I could easily follow along because I could FEEL IT.

At 10:27pm, baby Benjamin joined us. Perfectly pink and tiny at 6 pounds, 8 ounces. It felt so surreal. They kept him attached to the cord for a few minutes and that was a crazy sensation – he was out of me, but everything else was still inside. It’s just so amazing what our bodies can do!

Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to avoid tearing this time around but it was much more manageable than I had with Sky. While I was being fixed up, we ooooh’d and aahhhh’d at how cute Ben was with his fuzzy blonde hair.

We finally got to bed around 1 am and slept a little bit…off and on. The next morning we welcomed visitors! Family and friends and my sweet boy Sky who brought me a flower and a picture he colored. He was hesitant to touch the baby at first but overall, he did so well during his visit. I could tell that he was on the verge of a breakdown a few times so while Ben was being held by others, I spent some time snuggling with Sky. He crawled up in my bed and also fed me yogurt. He is such a love!

Overall, this birth experience was SO MUCH BETTER in every aspect. Other than coming earlier than expected, it was exactly what I had hoped for and I’m proud of myself that I made it through. In a way, I feel like it was healing for me to have this type of birth…to know that it can be better than what I had with Sky and that it is possible to manage without drugs or too much intervention.

He’s just delicious. I think we’ll keep him!

The First Week

The first week at home with baby Ben has been memorable and clear – much different than the blur, haze, and shock I had with Sky. I’m attributing this to a lot of things: a better labor experience, maturity in my confidence as a mom, and knowing that these newborn moments are fleeting so I should soak up each sweet second.

I also feel like this time around, the bonding process was instant. I love Ben so much and miss him even if we are away for a few minutes so I actually WANT to snuggle him all the time vs. feeling like managing a newborn is a burden {something that I felt often after having Sky}. I love Sky just as much but it took me a long time to really fall in love with him, if that makes sense.

Health-wise, we are all okay. My recovery process has been going well and I’m just trying to focus on resting, eating frequently, drinking lots of water, and taking all my vitamins, including my placenta pills. Baby Ben has been a little jaundiced but it’s improving. Nursing is….getting better but still rocky. I think breastfeeding is one of the hardest jobs in the world – physically, mentally, and emotionally. It’s something I’m committed to and thankfully, I have the supply to be able to provide it, but it’s still difficult at the start. We are both learning and I’m confident we’ll get into a good rhythm as we spend more time together.

Sleeping has also been surprisingly bearable. We don’t get very much of it but it doesn’t make me as angry and cranky this time around. There have only been 2 nights that I can think of where it felt very difficult. Perhaps it’s because we are already accustomed to being sleep deprived?

Sky has had his “moments” but he is also slowly morphing into a really wonderful big brother. When he hears Ben cry, he tries to soothe him and he lovingly refers to him as “his Benjamin baby”. We’ve been trying to take it easy on him and spend time with him so he doesn’t feel like it’s the Ben show 24/7.

Josh has been a rockstar dad. Whether it’s chasing Sky around all day, getting him out of the house so I can rest, doing the dishes and laundry, or running to the store for more muffins {because that’s what I’m craving}…he does it all. He even took both kids to my sister-in-law’s wedding a few days ago, which sadly I could not attend because I spiked a fever and was in bed with chills and horrible cramping, ew.

Ben himself has been snuggly and sleepy. He usually has a few minutes of wakefulness every 3ish hours, eats, then goes back to sleep. Life sure is easy being a baby! He has a calm demeanor and I’m crossing my fingers he stays this way and doesn’t develop any of the same colicky tendencies that Sky did.

I guess the big theme of this post so far is that it’s been easier – easier than the first, easier to love, easier to stay relaxed, and easier to manage. There have been, and probably will be many more, rough patches but we are just taking it day by day {or at least that’s what I have to remind myself to do…}. I have impending anxiety about Josh going back to work in 2 weeks, but for the moment….right now…..everything is okay.

Ok, I promise the birth story will be the next post!!

Home Closure

It’s been a while since I’ve talked about our house situation so I thought I’d bring everyone up to speed!

As a refresher…last fall, we announced that we had decided to do a short sale on our first home that we bought in 2006. Values had dropped so significantly in our area and we knew we could never get anything remotely close to what we paid for it. It was a sad situation and making the decision to stop paying our mortgage so we could escape was hard. But in the end, it paid off. With the help of a great legal team, we completed a short sale in exactly 3 months. On December 29, 2012, we drove away from our first home one final time. It was bittersweet {because short sales basically ruin your credit score}, but we were excited for a new adventure and knew we would never again, miss driving an hour each way to work.

So, why did we move and where were we going?

Well, after my Grandma passed away last May, it was decided the family would hold onto her old house – a 1971 rambler in the heart of Kirkland. Here is what it looked like in it’s “original” state. Because it’s only 10 minutes from work {and really 10 minutes from EVERYTHING}, we were blessed with the opportunity to move in, both to care for the house over the next few years, and make life with {soon to be} 2 kids a little easier.

After a thorough inspection, and subsequent renovation that turned out to be pretty extensive, we officially moved in early December.

Since that time, it’s been a whirlwind of packing, moving stuff around, unpacking, slowly bringing stuff to the house from our storage unit, and dealing with piles and piles of stuff. There’s been a lot of trips to the goodwill and a lot of rethinking what we actually need since the storage space in the “new” house is minimal. I REALLY wanted to have more photos to show you of the new space but the honest truth is that it’s just not picture ready. Slowly but surely, right??

It’s been shocking and amazing at how close we are to EVERYTHING {including my best friend and late night trips to Dairy Queen for blizzards, hehe} after living in the country for so long. Overall, it’s been a good transition even though the last few months have felt disorganized and chaotic.

My hope is that the coming months will bring a few decorating projects to completion and also basic things….like curtains on the windows and art on the walls. It will be interesting to see how much we can complete with a toddler and a newborn but I’m excited for what the summer will bring!

Friday Favorites + A Birthday

Happy Friday! It’s been a long rough week as we battled our way through the stomach flu. I’m so thankful it’s over because today is my 31st birthday and we have a special day planned! Josh and I are venturing out together to pick out fabric to reupholster this couch {finally!}, visit some salvage furniture shops, and of course, take a trip to Ikea!

I’ve been a terrible blog reader and commenter this week – feeling so behind in nearly every aspect of life. However, I did manage to stumble across a few things that made me smile. Here they are for you!

1. Flowers that make me long for spring.

2. The best online sources for Fabric – 2013 edition!

3. A sweet, colorful baby shower. I have a soft spot for yarn balls.

4. Thinking it would be a good idea to try this out – no phone in the presence of others for at least 21 days.

5. I am not usually a fan of baby names on nursery walls…but for this? I would make an exception.

6. I thought Kelle’s maternity pictures were gorgeous and this too:

“Working on: Making very purposeful decisions about the input in my life. I often do this little cup analogy in my head because Lord knows I love analogies. If our "cup" is full with good things--our family, people that challenge us to love, creativity that inspires us, reading that moves us, etc.--there isn't room for anything else. If we choose to make time for those not-so-great things, something good must spill over to make room. I'm stingy with the good in my cup--I'm not letting it spill over.”

     I always love her perspective.

7. More pretty iPhone cases. Sigh.

8. The ultimate guide to eating organic….on a budget {plus a free e-book!}.

9. Scrumptious cupcakes that would probably only turn out right if I had a well-trained chef make them for me!

10. A beautiful space for a young girl. Totally thinking of making the bird banner for little babe’s room.

11. A pretty printable placemat. Say that 3 times fast!

12. Room portraits from the top down – interesting!

Happy weekend!!

Grandma's House: Progress

Last time you saw this house, it was still in it’s original state. So much has changed. Here’s a peek at what we’ve been up to for the last 3 months {and when I say “we” I mean our amazing contractor, Wes}:

New plumbing and bathrooms, popcorn ceiling gone, flooring and doors replaced, fresh paint…SO MUCH. It’s sad to see some of it go but the house has life now! It’s fresh and new but still has little memories of grandma – like the way the floors creak in spots and the hum of the furnace.

We are now to the point where we are move-in ready! I hope to share pictures very soon but in the meantime, I’ll be up to my eyeballs in boxes. Wish us luck!

In case you need to catch up, more details on the big move can be found here.

A Little Surprise!

A Little Pumpkin from Emily Peck on Vimeo.

Happy Monday friends!

We're Moving.

In 2006, we bought our first home for an insanely overinflated price at the peak of the housing boom. Here we are, 6 years later and still in the same spot, except that values have dropped by more than half in our town. Foreclosures are sprinkled throughout our neighborhood and all the hard work and updates we put into the house now seem like a waste. In a weird way, I feel lucky that we are in Washington and were not hit as hard as some parts of the country.

Our town is okay but it’s not where we want to be long term for a lot of reasons –namely our commute times {over an hour each way to work}, access to parks/activities, schools, and general safety. The chances of us being able to get out anytime soon were dire. It just wasn’t going to be possible, unless we won the lottery.

A great perk of our current neighborhood I must admit: crazy mountain sunrises.

But then something happened. Something really sad! My sweet Grandma passed away in May and left behind a 1970’s rambler in a prime location – 10 minutes from work, closer proximity to our relatives and some of our very best friends, and the opposite of all the other reasons I mentioned above.

It’s hard to admit you need help, and it feels even worse to take advantage of a sad situation, but when the opportunity presented itself and we discovered that the house wasn’t going to be sold right now, we seized the chance to occupy it, help renovate, and maintain it over the next while until it’s ready to go on the market once and for all.

After much hard work and preparation, we listed our house on the market last Thursday afternoon. By Saturday evening, we had received 3 separate offers, each better than the next. We still have a ways to go {bank approvals, inspection, closing} so it may be a few months until we are fully moved, but so far, it’s off to a better start than I expected. It’s depressing that we are accepting a huge loss but in this case, the pros outweigh the cons and it’s what best for our little family. Plus, BONUS, we get to enjoy a little slice of my grandma for a little longer.

Our parents have been MORE than accommodating during this whole process, from helping us move our belongings to a storage unit, to watching Sky, to dealing with the inspection and all the things that need to be fixed at Grandma’s before we can move in. I just hope that someday we can repay them for how much they’ve helped us.

And so begins this new adventure!! Wheeee!!

Dear Italy

10 years ago at this very moment, Josh and I were gallivanting around Venice, Florence, and Rome on an Art History tour with our community college. I can’t explain how a city gets inside your blood but it just does. Those moments of standing on centuries old cobblestone as gondolas pass by or feeling the breeze whip through your hair as you take in the view at the top of a Tuscan hill before sunset…it’s just….nothing you can ever ever accurately describe. You just have to GO THERE and feel it {hear it…smell it….see it….and taste it….} for yourself.

Rome and Florence was one masterpiece after the next. The Sistine Chapel {You want know what inner peace feels like? Go here and bask in the glory}, the Vatican, David, Ponte Vecchio, Trevi Fountain, Ostia Antica, the Colosseum, and the list goes on and on and on. But as much as it was all amazing and beautiful, there’s was one place that trumped all of it. 

Venice.

If I could fly there tomorrow, I’d drop everything and do it {even if it meant not going to New York City for BlogHer}. It’s THAT magnificent.

I’ll never forget taking my first water taxi from the airport to our hotel and seeing the city at dusk and what it felt like to be in a completely different world – you could hear dinner dishes clanking, people singing, and windows being closed for the evening. I’ll also never forget walking through mazes of streets just as nightfall hit, only to turn a corner into the open magic that is Piazza San Marco at night – the most beautiful place in the entire world.

I still feel like it was just yesterday that I was standing at the entrance of St. Mark’s Basilica feeling the heavy silence and coolness of all the marble that waves over you when you step into one of these places of worship. Regardless of what religion you are, standing inside here will make you believe in something. It’s powerful energy you just can’t replicate. I still have dreams on a regular basis that I get to go back and go inside that glorious church…or that I’m wandering around Venice eating gelato….or walking through the Rialto market.

I’ll never forget that final night, group dining at Trattoria Sempione in a cozy corner with the lights glimmering as gondolas go by….singing off in the distance….and the sound of water calmly swaying from side to side from the gondolier pole. It’s INDESCRIBABLE how full Venice makes my heart. If you ever have the chance to go…..GO GO!!!

I still can’t believe it’s been 10 years and my hope is that it will not be another 10 before I get to return. In 3 more years, we will celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary…..hmmmmm……..I think a trip might be in order.

*Picture note – in 2002, I did not own a digital camera so many of these are all old scans or digital images from some of my tour-mates. The resolution is not high enough in most to make them full size so that’s why they look small and a bit grainy.

Eat, drink, and be merry

It’s fair to say the entire weekend has been centered around food and gathering. It’s the perfect thing really….eating, talking, visiting, eating more, drinking, dessert. I’m a happy camper.

Saturday night, I met up with a few of my favorite bloggin’ girls for dinner at Z’Tejas in Bellevue, followed by frozen yogurt, which led to mall standing {it could probably be a pastime} and roaming through Forever 21. Part of me felt like I was in high school all over again. Oh, and PS….the mall was so crowded! Bellevue, hello?! Remember when you were tiny? I LOVED seeing these ladies and we had such an awesome time commiserating about life, blogging, raising young kiddos, working, target, colored pants…all of the important things.

Left to right: amanda, jill, chelsey, fiona, chelsea, melissa, mandy, amy, ashley, mandy, me, stephanie, and kiara.

This is Chelsea. She makes me laugh hard! She has a cute daughter named Lily {just like our doggie} and another little bun on the way. You should check out her blog because she’s adorable. <3 {Linking up with Mandy at Harper’s Happenings! On me: pants/kohls {again}, shirt/marshall’s, shoes/ruche}

Aren’t these hats the best? You can get your very own at Forever 21! We got shoosh’d for taking pictures, ooops!

The merriment continued on Sunday for a brunch spectacular at Salty’s on Alki. I’ve always wanted to try it so as a final 30th birthday party celebration with all our family and a couple close friends, it finally happened!

The amount of food is out of control. Anything your heart desires…it’s there. Crepes, omelets, pasta, tons of meat, oysters, crab, shrimp, pancakes, bacon, eggs benedict, 50 million desserts….enough to keep you full forever. Sometimes I get a little weary of buffets…because there are a lot of hands on the same pair of tongs..but really, this was completely fine and the food was soo soo soo good! They even bought us warm towels to wipe the germs with!

We reserved a private room downstairs and I’m SO GLAD WE DID. The main dining room was packed, like standing room only! It was so wonderful, we had tons of space, a gorgeous view of Seattle, our own private deck, and the kiddos could run all over without disturbing the peace. Such a perfect way to lounge while you stuff your face.

This is my best friend, Fallon. I love her a lot…that’s why we make hearts, yo!

Aside from all this consuming and quality friend/family time, the last 2 days of festivities was topped off with a very VERY special birthday gift:

I am like, indescribable, over the moon excited. Not only is blogging one of my favorite things in the entire world and I’m super giddy to learn, hear great speakers, and be in the presence of people I’ve followed and loved for YEARS, BUT….New York City, man. It’s been a dream for as long as I can remember. The one thing I need to do before I die, the pinnacle, the PEAK! I can’t even think about it without getting butterflies. I am SO SO SO excited.

On turning 30.

{Print via Studio Mela – just one of many many amazing pieces of art}

Today is my 30th birthday. It’s a big one, for sure. Lately I find myself filled with a mix of emotions that always seem to surround these high-profile milestones. There’s so much hype and everyone has a different opinion on what it means to age. I’ve been feeling like I’m supposed to feel passionate about it, like because it’s THIRTY, I’m expected to go crazy, have a mid-life crisis, wish I was still 20, or mope over the fact that I’m getting wrinkles.

The honest truth is that I’m happy for this day. It’s finally here, I’m embracing it, and I don’t really feel bad about getting older. With each year comes more layers, more learning, more growing – like rings on a tree I tell you! I feel like I’m officially an adult now! Of course, there are also drawbacks; I can’t stay up super late and be able to function the following day, the music the “kids” are playing is too loud, and I’m not sure if I should still be shopping in the juniors section. Does anyone know? How about Forever 21?

Like I mentioned in my 2012 resolutions, change is in the air. There will be new challenges and new experiences this year, I know that for sure, but it will be awesome and I say bring it on! I will know myself better than I ever did in my 20’s. I wonder if I’ll be saying the same thing about my 30’s when I turn 40?

Cheers to a new decade!